In the old TV series M*A*S*H* Colonel Potter gives a command to the Chaplain, Father Mulcahy. There is too much “hanky-panky” going on in the unit so he was directed to give a sermon on sex. Father Mulcahy was just a little overwhelmed by the topic and mentioned that his specialty was the Parable of the Good Samaritan. He had a lot of good sermons on that one.

A sermon based on the reading from Mark’s Gospel for today takes us right at the topic of divorce – not one of my top ten’s!! “Some Pharisees came and tested Him by asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” (Mark 10:2) What I say today could be painful. Some of you have wounds that are open. Maybe somebody left you. Maybe you left somebody. And such an event could have been recent or it could have been years ago, but still the pain is present.

Bob and Carol Stamp got back from their trip to the Midwest this week. Bob stopped in the office and was telling me what a wonderful time they had with Carol’s brothers and sisters and their spouses. 4 couples were together and every one of them had been married over 50 years. That tells you a few things about them – first, they are all very old, but secondly they have something that few families have – marriages that last.

Who has not been touched by divorce and its pain? Maybe your parents went through this, maybe your kids or grandkids. A neighbor? Co-worker? Friend? Fellow church member? Maybe you have been there or you are there right now. In my office is a bunch of stuff including a match book cover. “Jennifer and Robert, March 30, 1996” No matches left here. I did the wedding, went to the reception at the Denver Kickers Club in Golden. But not too long after they said, “I Will”, they didn’t and the marriage ended. This is a reminder to me that I have a great responsibility to prepare people for marriage, marriage that includes days that are better and days that are worse.

What should I say about this whole subject? It is personal and it is painful. There can be nothing more wonderful than marriage. In marriage, a good one, joys are multiplied and sorrows are divided. In Ecclesiastes we read, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls down and has no one to help him up! Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (4:9-10,12) But there can be nothing more painful than a poor marriage or a marriage that is fractured, lacks love, or ends in divorce.

So, what do you want to hear? That is the question that came up with Jesus. After being asked His views on divorce Jesus replied, “What did Moses command you?” They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.” And to this Jesus said, “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law.” (See Mark 10:3-5) It seems that Moses gave the people what they wanted to hear because their hearts became hard to the way that God designed the marriage relationships to be.

The Pharisees were quoting Deuteronomy 24 in this encounter with Jesus, “If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes a certificate of divorce, gives it to her, and sends her from his house…” (Verse 1) The question among the folks became the phrases “displeasing to him” and “something indecent about her”. One Rabbi (Shammai) said this was seen in the committing of adultery. But another Rabbi (Hillel), who quickly got more popular, said something indecent or displeasing could be that supper was burned, or that she talked too loud, or too much, or she gained a few too many pounds. Send her away!!

Jesus was battling something here. People want to hear what they want to hear. Moses permitted something but they expanded on it, undoubtedly altered it!! It reminds me on the verse in the Old Testament that says, “And everyone did what was right in their own eyes.” Or in the New Testament, “For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.” (II Timothy 4:3)

Jesus would have also known what happened to another person who spoke out against divorce, especially the divorce of King Herod who had taken his brother’s wife as his own – and John, the one who spoke, not the Lutheran but the Baptist, was put in prison and had his head cut off!!

But Jesus, knowing the political and the religious situation spoke what they needed to hear, “At the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female’. ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” (Mark 10:5-9) What they needed to hear is that God from the very beginning created marriage for the good of His creation. In His love He gave us this gift. He gave this for us because He wants to give us the very best. The Bible says this, “’I hate divorce’, says the Lord God of Israel.” (Malachi 2:16)

I am always amazed when two people come in my office and say that want to get married. They are usually so different from one another. One is quiet; the other is outgoing. One watches every cent; the other spends every cent. Two people different from each other find their life completed by each other. I know that in my marriage I have helped my wife become a complete person – she knew nothing about sports before we got married – now she knows that it is a waste of time!! Two become one.

What do we need to hear? First, there is no place in the life of a Christian to point the finger at others who have struggled in marriage. I think it was Jesus who said that we shouldn’t be the first to cast a stone. If you are married we need to hear that our hearts need to turn again to the one that we pledged our lives to. Too often we can take the person that we married for granted. Too often we can forget that our love is to be patient and kind, never filled with rudeness, not selfish, never easily angered, and it can never keep a record of the wrong that the other person has done to us. If you have let love die, if you haven’t told this person who carries half the debt on your mortgage that you count yourself wonderfully blessed that they are in your life, it is time to do so!! There was a guy who was asked what his wife’s favorite flower was and he responded – “I think it is Pillsbury”. If you’re that guy – there is work to be done!!

What do you want to hear? The life giving word from Christ!! Some of you carry great hurt and maybe the sermon up to now hasn’t been too comforting and encouraging and helpful. But there is always a message from Christ that is greater than our pain and our sin and the burdens of our soul. Listen to Psalm 130, “If You, O Lord kept a record of sins, O Lord, who could stand? But with You there is forgiveness; therefore You are feared.” (Verses 3-4)

A couple came to me and they had such hurt and pain in this blessed gift of marriage. When they walked in my office they wished they had never become husband and wife. But it was too late now. And then the hard and painful stuff was spoken and they went through the process of confessing to each other how they had ruined the marriage and then the hard part – would they forgive each other? Could they forgive each other? I didn’t know if they could actually say the words. They were so hard to say!! “I Forgive YOU!! I Love YOU!!” Tears all around. They did what God did for them in the wounds of Jesus and what He brought to them at the meal. They gave what they had received.

What do you want to hear? I hope you crave the message that Christ loves you. You are forgiven!! You are His child. He tenderly calls you to His side. For sins in a relationship, for screwing up, for broken vows, for cruel words, for wrong priorities, for hurting others, Jesus forgives us, and allows us to stand and live life again. If you have been the recipient of pain and rejection and loss, if someone has made life hard for you, you want to hear that God’s love is not so temporary, that He will be faithful to you and that your life is in His hands. And it is true. We want to hear, we need to hear words from Him!!

Father Mulcahy loved the Parable of the Good Samaritan, and that is a good one. I bet another that he loved and that you know is the Parable of the Prodigal Son. The wayward son makes mistake after mistake, runs away, wastes money, ruins reputation and just about gives up on life. But the remembrance of his father is what makes him get new hope. “I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men. So he got up and went to his father.” (Luke 15:18-20)

Hired man? Slave? No, the father said that this was his own son. Robe, ring, shoes, a calf that would be fed at the feast. “The one that was lost is now found; the one that was dead is now alive!!” That is what we want to hear and we need to hear and that is what our Father says to us!!

What do you want to hear? As a disciple of Jesus Christ I hope that you want to hear God’s purposes for marriage and family. I hope that you want to hear what good God has in store for you, His marvelous plans for you. I hope that we are open to hear God’s strong words about how marriage and family should be, even when we have failed to live fully in God’s holy ways. And most especially I hope we crave hearing about the love of God given to completely and freely in Jesus. We want to hear a word of hope and promise and joy from the source of all of these things.

What do you want to hear? You want to hear Christ. Amen!!